Big dogs vs. small dogs
Big dogs: Hello wonderful human! Would you please rub my belly and scratch my ears?! I will be eternally grateful for your attention! Do not be alarmed by my large appearance I just love to cuddle and give kisses!
Small dogs: FIGHT ME YOU FUCK! WILL FUCK YOUR SHIT UP! YOU WANNA PIECE OF ME?! LET'S GO! WILL FUCKING END YOU! I MAY BE TINY BUT DO NOT FUCKING UNDERESTIMATE ME!