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To the afterlife you go
To the afterlife you go
Even in our worst day, we still have the
Greatest
God.
decaying_gr0ups decaying_gr0ups
22 may
Even in our worst day, we still have the Greatest God.
The first thing a man looks
at in a woman is her heart.
The fact that her tits are
in the way is NOT OUR FAULT
pcock
5d
The first thing a man looks at in a woman is her heart. The fact that her tits are in the way is NOT OUR FAULT
TARGET CASHIER:
"DID YOU FIND EVERYTHING YOU WERE LOOKING FOR?"
ME:
"FIRST OF ALL, I WASN'T LOOKING FOR ANY OF THIS."
TARGET CASHIER: "DID YOU FIND EVERYTHING YOU WERE LOOKING FOR?" ME: "FIRST OF ALL, I WASN'T LOOKING FOR ANY OF THIS."
When you text her to "calm down" and then you spend 15 minutes staring at
typing...'
When you text her to "calm down" and then you spend 15 minutes staring at typing...'
Check out my single-use power hammer!
Check out my single-use power hammer!
Apparently, 99% of men have a hard time locating this zipper
best_what best_what
19 mar
Apparently, 99% of men have a hard time locating this zipper
It's better to have nobody than to have someone who is half there, or doesn't want to be there.
aintThe1 aintThe1
12 mar
It's better to have nobody than to have someone who is half there, or doesn't want to be there.
Here you go: two
Happy Mealg and a
Barely
Here you go: two Happy Mealg and a Barely
Don't be afraid Don't save a life to give blood be afraid
Save a life to give blood
Don't be afraid Don't save a life to give blood be afraid Save a life to give blood
Picked up a hitchhiker. Seemed like a nice guy.
After a few miles, he asked me if
I wasn afraid that he might be a serial killer?
I told him that the odds of two serial killers being in the same car were extremely unlikely
best_just_4jokes best_just_4jokes
10 mar
Picked up a hitchhiker. Seemed like a nice guy. After a few miles, he asked me if I wasn afraid that he might be a serial killer? I told him that the odds of two serial killers being in the same car were extremely unlikely
"Describe yourself in three words"
Me:
Meat_Head Meat_Head
12 mar
"Describe yourself in three words" Me:
when you walking downstairs and accidently step two steps down
TopHat TopHat
9 mar
when you walking downstairs and accidently step two steps down
you push our dick deep enough ina irl you can hit her toxic button
worldwideChic worldwideChic
19 mar
you push our dick deep enough ina irl you can hit her toxic button
When you're in the elevator and you press the button while there's people approaching
Dontboi Dontboi
18 mar
When you're in the elevator and you press the button while there's people approaching
my dog ran away with my phone and found this
YOUR FACE WHEN YOUR SARCASM IS SO PERFECT
THEY SERINUS
YOUR FACE WHEN YOUR SARCASM IS SO PERFECT THEY SERINUS
Koko the gorilla loved Mister Rogers Neighborhood, and when Rogers took a trip to meet her, she not only embraced the television icon, but followed standard protocol based on what shed seen on the show: she took his shoes off.
mental flasc
Koko the gorilla loved Mister Rogers Neighborhood, and when Rogers took a trip to meet her, she not only embraced the television icon, but followed standard protocol based on what shed seen on the show: she took his shoes off. mental flasc
I LOVE RUMORS.
I ALWAYS FIND OUT AMAZING THINGS ABOUT
MYSELF I
NEVER KNEW.
Up
Talking
I LOVE RUMORS. I ALWAYS FIND OUT AMAZING THINGS ABOUT MYSELF I NEVER KNEW. Up Talking
IF YOUR GIRLFRIEND HAS FRIEND THAT ANNDYS YOU
DON'T TELL HER TO STOP BEING FRIENDS WITH HER. JUST CASUALLY MENTION HOW PRETTY SHE IS
SAMOAN1229 SAMOAN1229
9 mar
IF YOUR GIRLFRIEND HAS FRIEND THAT ANNDYS YOU DON'T TELL HER TO STOP BEING FRIENDS WITH HER. JUST CASUALLY MENTION HOW PRETTY SHE IS
David Woodland
@DavidSven
We pay my oldest $1 every time he reads a book. We're talking 160 page
chapter books.
I'm out $120 this year and he thinks he's ripping me off. Best investment ever.
David Woodland @DavidSven We pay my oldest $1 every time he reads a book. We're talking 160 page chapter books. I'm out $120 this year and he thinks he's ripping me off. Best investment ever.